Safety in Love
…an experiential anecdote
The full moon was large and rising over the mountain to our right. There were small clouds crossing its radiating light and stars beginning to twinkle in a perfect vignette.
We stopped and got out of the car to take in, with full presence and awe, the masterpeaceof nature and life itself.
He pulled me into him and held me as I continued to cry—a faucet that had been turned on earlier in the day, expressive of the immense felt-sense of gratitude and joy for the beauty, thoughtfulness, depth, meaning, growth, love that has been abundantly pouring into my life.
With my body pressed to his so I could feel the vibrations of his heartbeat and voice through my back—healing past, present, and future—he began to gently sing a healing chant into the cold night air.
And while he visualized the nectar of life pouring over us both—softening, cleansing, releasing what is ready and necessary to soften, cleanse, and release—I recalibrated my nervous system. For the first time co-regulating into safety rather than more trauma.
I remembered that not only did I ask for all this, but I also finally feel worthy and deserving of receiving it.
I felt into my expanded capacity to receive and hold it all. I cried more tears of gratitude, grace, compassion.
We breathed together in silence. He kissed the top of my head and squeezed me tighter.
This is what safety in love actually feels like.
And I couldn’t have gotten here if I hadn’t chosen to love me first…first.
It might feel like a far away dream for you right now, but if you desire that “love story for the ages”, you have to be the love of your own life first.
You are worthy.
You are deserving.
You can do it.
